Headteacher Bob Buntine, who has been the head of Delapre Primary School for 28 years and teaching for 33 years, answers frequently asked questions by parents on overcoming first day jitters at primary school.

Q: What should I do if my child cries when I leave them on the first day at their new reception class?

A: The majority of parents worry that somehow, somebody else is judging them as a "bad parent". They are not! On that first morning, each family has its own worries.
The rule is clear, the child is crying because they do not like the process of saying, "Goodbye" to, say, mummy. Get this over quickly. Do NOT linger, you are hurting your own child's initial experience of school. The parent who refuses to leave is a reception teacher's nightmare. If there is a real problem the school will contact you.
Has there been a family bereavement or similar event in your family recently? This could make your child extremely insecure i.e. more than average. If so, tell the teacher beforehand.

Q: Should I ring the school on my child's first day to make sure he/she is settling in?

A: NO! They will ring you if there is a huge problem. Trust your child to give it a good shot. If you are worrying then it is virtually a 100 per cent certainty that you have influenced your child into a similar frame of mind. This is the one time when you must be jolly about everything.

Q: How will I know if my child is happy on their first day?

A: If you ask your child, "What did you do in school today?" and they say, "Nothing" then they've had a pretty good day! This is a typical boy response, girls will usually tell you a bit more. Try not to push any harder for a reply as you are placing more pressure on the new experience of school.

Q: What are the rules regarding school uniform?

A: Each school has its own rules on uniform. They are important for very good reasons. Most importantly, because they develop a sense of identity and belonging.
Although expensive, most parents LOVE uniform, as it cuts any hassle in the mornings. Back up the school totally, in order not to make trouble for yourself later on the fashion front.

Q: How closely is the playground monitored?

A: Every school is different. With young children you will need a minimum of two, which allows for one adult taking a sick child to the office. However, some small schools will have excellent systems that are different to this. So there is no perfect answer to this. At Delapre, we are a large school, so we have four adults on duty at any one time, although for a while, one of them will be making the other three their cups of tea!

Q: What happens if my child wets him/herself? What are the procedures?

A: Do NOT make a fuss. There must be absolutely no pressure, which will make things much worse. The child will be taken out of class and changed and returned. This should happen seamlessly in any reception class.
Delapre, like other schools, has a lot of spare underwear that it purchases for such occasions.
We advise parents not to worry about such events. The more you worry, the more your child will pick it up (as pressure).

Q: What are the rules over using sun cream?

A: In this day of "There is no such thing as an accident" we are not allowed to apply anything. Hence the decision on sun cream is up to the parent in every way. You must apply it in the morning if you deem it necessary and ensure your child is aware of its proper use. Please remember that we are in this situation because, somewhere, a parent has taken legal action against a teacher for trying to help.

FINALLY...
Please bear in mind that any story that comes home is seen through a four-year-old's eyes. "He hit me" more often than not means "He hit me back". Please always try to put your adult hat on and try to filter out the middle path of reality.
Remember, research indicates that the effects of a successful/positive start to school go on for years. Make sure your child has one!